Running Man: I have this feeling that you had a promiscuous past.
Lucky: To be honest, yes. Add it up in my list... partee boy, bitch, and now... promiscuous
Running Man: I still don't mind... What's important is who you are today.... right?
Lucky: (kinilig)
I was a little promiscuous in the good old days. But my promiscuity to date... I guess... is slowing down. I have my limits. And I am not getting any younger.
...I once became someone's number 2. Without me knowing.
...I made out with my best friend. Not just once. Not twice. Not 3x. I think we did it 5x. In our defense, we were just under the influence of drugs. Both of us were mature enough to understand that it was just a kiss.
...I had sex with a married guy. In their bed. With their wedding picture in the night table.
Okay, okay... Too much information. I had... HAD... lived a promiscuous life. I want to take a "lighter" route. I'm not saying that I'll be one altar boy but I am putting a hiatus on my promiscuity. Need to prioritize on my health, relationship with people, my new work... and with Running Man. Yes. Running Man is on my list. Not equally important but still important.
Lalo na ngayon, tag-ulan. Ang daming palaka. At pagod na pagod na ako humalik sa mga palakang di naman nagiging prinsipe.
I am promiscuous... but like everyone else... I am fragile.
Running Man and I had our first official date last weekend. No expectations whatsoever. I did not considered our first meet up as a date since all we did was make out and get intoxicated.
We met up before 7pm in Makati, we were supposed to watch the 730pm screening of Inception but all the seats were already taken. We bought tickets for the 930pm screening instead. With hours to kill, we decided to get 1 round of drinks first, thinking that being tipsy while watching Inception would be really interesting.
We ordered our drinks and talked... yes.... we talked. That's what I value most when on a date. We exchanged stories, about our own lives, our friends, our family. Even talked about past relationships. They say that you shouldn't talk about your ex's on a date. In a gay guy's world, I think it's okay. Time flew and we got back to the movie house for the movie.
+Points... a guy who knows how to have good conversation without any drama...
He's a great movie buddy. We both like watching trailers. Hahaha. Then the movie started. He grabbed my right hand....
+Points... a guy who's not afraid to hold my hand in the cinema.
After the movie, he asked me if I want to come with him and meet his friends. His straight non-homophobic friends. He said he wants me to meet them.
+Points... a guy who let's me in into his world.
I usually do good around other people. I met his friends who were already drunk. Nice bunch of hags and stags. Had 3 shots of tequila in less than an hour. Hmmmm... is this sort of a right of passage? Hahaha. We transfered to a club to get some much needed dancing, still with his friends. At the club... still... more booze. I got more comfortable hanging out with his friends.
Every now and then, Running Man comes to my side and hugs me.
+Points... sweet!
One by one, his friends left. 5 of us stayed and finished our drinks. A number of people still dancing at the club. Running man and I had a small chit-chat, asking me if I had fun. I said yes and that I was glad that he invited me to meet and party with his friends. Then, he just kissed me.... IN A STRAIGHT CLUB.
++++++Points!!!
We left the club and had breakfast. After breakfast, he waited for me to get a cab. I wished that we can spend the morning together but both of us were tired and sleepy. A cab stopped in front of us. We said our goodbyes. Then he gave me a kiss on the lips.
++++++Points!!!
Got home and slept with a smile on my face. Such a sweet guy. A guy who's comfortable with his sexuality, who's not afraid to show how he feels. I then found out that I was the first guy that he kissed in front of his friends, the first guy that he kissed along the streets of Makati. He might be making bola but you know what, I don't care.
When I'm with him, I can be me. I can be loud, be playful, be a little bitch. I can be me. And that's big points for running man.
But the next question is.... will he still accept me and continue to see me when he finds out that I am HIV positive? Or will he live up with his pseudo name... will he run away?
Away from me or with me?
I haven't decided yet on when to tell him. So far, what we have is a little serious. We've been seeing each other for just about a week or so. It's still early and we're not rushing things. No sex yet, we haven't even talked about it. Don't know where we're heading. Again, no rush. Right now, we like each other. Not "just like" but "like" each other. You know?
Some people are happy being single. Some are not. Some are okay that they are single but they still long for that knight in shiny tiara. All all, I think no one wants to be alone.
Some people that I know, friends and frenemies, whine that there are few people out there that meet their standards, some complain about their relationship status in Facebook. One minute they want to be serious, the next minute, they go out on a hunt and fuck some random stranger.
In other words, they’re not lonely. They’re horny. They want to get off. It’s an endorphin rush. And when the rush dissipates, they’ll feel alone again. This cycle continues until, one day, they’ve turned 40 and are still alone.
I understand how they feel because I’ve been single for most of my life. What I don’t understand is thecomplaining. I know it’s hard, but I work at it and don’t sit on my ass waiting for things to happen.
You sometimes get lucky, you sometimes get rejected. If the shoe fits right? Keep on dating until you find someone who you like, change your criteria, or just shut the fuck up because no one wants to hear about your relationship status because there are many other people in the same situation. Like me.
It's okay if you go emo for a few minutes. It's normal for single gay guys. I have my moments. But do not make it a habit. Don't sound so desperate.
xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo
Running Man and I decided to have our first official date this weekend. It's a trial run. No major expectations whatsover. A date should be fun and hassle free. Sex free? Yeah... sex will have to wait. There is something really interesting about Running Man that I want to check out first. Let's see if the shoe fits :)
With a few more bum-days left, my schedule was packed with gimmicks, parties and last-hurrah-celebrations. Unfortunately, the gloomy weather was not very cooperative. But hell with the rain, a party won't be a party without Lucky making a big scene.
I attended an old friend's birthday party. As far as I know, my friend has two types of friends... the we-know-we-are-gay group and the di-ako-bakla-sino-bakla-pero-bottom-kami-lahat group. I belong to the fun side, the group who is comfortable to say "chorva" without flinching. I decided to wear some skinny, skimpy, and a little more fashion forward outfit just to irritate the peppercorns. It worked... and I can read it in their shallow thought-balloons (what is he wearing?). Seriously, plaid polo is too 90's these days. I rather wear a skirt than be caught wearing a table cloth.
Next... I plugged in my iPod to play handbag tunes. But this step failed. The peppercorns love love love Kylie Minogue and Agnes. Ikaw na ang pamintang nadurog!
Step 3... I have no problems staring at people and give them a condescending look. It makes them feel a little uncomfortable. My friend and I played the dumb blonde role as well. But they fought back with their own brand of conyo language. Unfortunately, their conyo slang lacks the true essence of a true conyo... Ang totoong conyo at sosyal, kahit tag-lish, correct ang grammar. Susmiyo... their style is more of jejeconyo.
At one point during the night, a familiar guy entered the party... un-glamorously drunk and kept on blurting "Bro, I'm drunk." He then had a quick chit-chat with his "bros" about some guy outing him out.
Sa lagay nyang yan di pa sya out? I know this guy, his exes, his past dates, his kalandian. Not sure why he was so shocked about the general gay public's knowledge of his sexuality.
Anyway... I got tired of "testing" them so I decided to chug vodka and get a few shots of tequila. I did not noticed that most of my friends already left the party. It's now me vs the peppercorns.
I then texted Running Man.
Running Man and I have been texting for almost a month. Haven't seen each other yet but I think we can really hit it off. I asked him to join me at the party. He arrived and I immediately gave him a shot or two of tequila. And then... we made out in the center of the room. PDA at its finest.
What was I thinking? Wiat... what's this guy's name again? Oh yeah, just enjoy the kiss bitch and make a big fuzz. Hmmmm... he smells nice.
After a minute or so making out. We laughed. End scene.
An hour or so, the guests left the hotel one by one. I asked my friend if Running Man and I can stay over til check-out time and he said yes. We were already in bed, cuddling, and ready to sleep til two friends came in and brought a half-empty bottle of tequilla. More shots? Oh shit.
I took the shot glass, took a slice of lemon, and took a pinch of salt... Now now... where to put the salt? In the shot glass (classic)? In the lemon (schuchal)? In Running Man's skin (weeeeeeeh)? My friend was shocked with the body shot. Running Man did the same thing to me. He was more adventurous than I am, he pulled my shirt up and put the salt in my nip area. Oh.Em.Gee. Yes... there was another show at 5am in the morning.
While my two friends were busy discussing their previous affairs, Running Man and I made out while laying in bed. Still with our clothes on. Medyo wholesome pa din since every now and then, we giggled while making out. Ang landi lang diba?
Finally, at 7am, my two friends decided to give the tequila shots a rest (kasi naubos na namin yung tequila). They went outside and found an empty sofa bed and slept. I locked the bedroom doors behind them.
(Bedroom scene deleted, no MTRCB rating yet)
So there... I made a big fuzz, a big scene at my friend's party.
It was fun, the beat was sick. Did Lucky took a ride on his disco stick?
It's been almost two weeks since I updated this blog. Been busy these past few days - meeting friends, working on my pre-employment requirements, partying and munching on anything within reach. For now I'll just write a quick update on what's been happening to me. I know you miss me... xoxo
Hired. After months of bum-ness, I finally got a job. It was not my dream job but I need to be practical and realistic. I don't want to burn my savings just bumming around. I just need to submit and finish my pre-employment requirements so I can start before this month ends. The position is very interesting. I asked X about how challenging the work would be and he said that it will be stressful yet will work on my advantage. In the past 6 years of working, regardless of what type of industry, I stay true to my expertise. With this new job, it will further enhance my skill set. I plan to be in middle management in the next 5 years. No more slacking off.
Friends. After I signed my employment contract, I met up with Kofiboy for dinner and coffee. It was sort of a double celebration since both of us will start on our new work this month. We had headed to Jalapeno in Home Depot for dinner then we had coffee at Starbucks. I then met up with X for some drinks then head home. I looked at my calendar and saw that I have less than 15 days of bumming around.
Day-Off. A day-off in my bum life consists of having a facial, a massage, a manicure, a pedicure and a haircut. Nice noh?
Birthday Pre-Planning. Months from now I'll be celebrating my twenty-xth birthday. I want a big celebration this time with all the glitz and glams and boys. A Mardi Gras weekend. Watch out watch out... the bitch is back! I need an escort though. Application ongoing.
So there... need to hit the sack. More updates to come. I'm back you bitches!
There are things that I am sorry about... the list grows... by one or a few items. Their importance and relevance range from the tiny to the titanic.
Some people carry the hurt with them while others carry on. With forgiveness come apologies. The cycle continues and this vicious cycle never ends. For now.... let me give a big shout out to those that I hurt in the past....
