My life changed after my HIV diagnosis last 2009. My so-called night life was almost non-existent nowadays. Each day, I became more domesticated. Yes, I am becoming Martha Stewart - the domesticated diva.
Don't get me wrong, being a home-buddy is actually a good thing. I get more well-rested after spending almost 50-60 hours a week at the office. I spend more time with my family. I get to read books again - books that I bought a gazillion years ago that I need to dust-off. I was back when I was just a young adult - a loner who locks up in his room in his PJs reading books, listening to music, and daydreams a lot.
Last night though, I went out. I went to my friend's party. It's been months since I saw my friends. Wine, cheese and good company. Reminiscing the past every now and then. Yes - we grew up but we never grew apart. I guess it is part of getting old.
I went home around 2am. My friend begged me to stay but I told him that it was getting late, it's raining and I still live down south. I gave him a big hug. I told him that we should see each other soon, but "soon" usually means months from now.
I am getting used to a different lifestyle. I don't want to get stuck in the past - partying like crazy over the weekend, getting hung over the next day, brain dead on Monday. But don't get me wrong - I still enjoy going to parties and events. But the sex, drugs and rock & roll drama needs to stop.
Martha Stewart once said, "Life is too complicated not to be orderly." My life needs order. My life needs a little compartmentalization. Do this. Don't do that. And it is not entirely because of my HIV status, but it's just something that I have to do.