Showing posts with label emo. Show all posts
Showing posts with label emo. Show all posts

If The Shoe Fits


Some people are happy being single. Some are not. Some are okay that they are single but they still long for that knight in shiny tiara. All all, I think no one wants to be alone.

Some people that I know, friends and frenemies, whine that there are few people out there that meet their standards, some complain about their relationship status in Facebook. One minute they want to be serious, the next minute, they go out on a hunt and fuck some random stranger.

In other words, they’re not lonely. They’re horny. They want to get off. It’s an endorphin rush. And when the rush dissipates, they’ll feel alone again. This cycle continues until, one day, they’ve turned 40 and are still alone.

I understand how they feel because I’ve been single for most of my life. What I don’t understand is the complaining. I know it’s hard, but I work at it and don’t sit on my ass waiting for things to happen.

You sometimes get lucky, you sometimes get rejected. If the shoe fits right? Keep on dating until you find someone who you like, change your criteria, or just shut the fuck up because no one wants to hear about your relationship status because there are many other people in the same situation. Like me.

It's okay if you go emo for a few minutes. It's normal for single gay guys. I have my moments. But do not make it a habit. Don't sound so desperate.


xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo


Running Man and I decided to have our first official date this weekend. It's a trial run. No major expectations whatsover. A date should be fun and hassle free. Sex free? Yeah... sex will have to wait. There is something really interesting about Running Man that I want to check out first. Let's see if the shoe fits :)

3 Years

How many bad dates do you have to go on before you find the love of your life? How many times do you have to purge before you can fit into that pair of pants for your friend's party on the weekend? How many? How much? How?

You keep on thinking it's going to come, but it doesn't. Then, you think it's going to come again, but it doesn't. Over and over. A repetitious and vicious cycle of ups and downs.

And, when it does come, it's short and rather anticlimactic. No fireworks. No cigarette.

Countless times I've come over the past several years. So many times that I have no juice left. Parched. Dehydrated. Powder. Dry.

It's exhausting.

Still, my fields get razed and rebuilt, time and time again, hoping that my time will come. There will be no waiting by the waves of gold, expecting a voice to whisper my destiny to me.

It's been 3 years since I was in a relationship. I've been in two short lived relationships. The first one chocked me to death, the second one used me as his 2nd hobby. But never was I jaded with love. And even now, being a poz, I keep on hoping that I'll find that someone. Or that someone to find me.

If not... then... oh well... Life continues right? :)

I Deserve Better

I have recently been chanting a mantra to myself whenever I‘m feeling a low and need a boost of self-esteem.

You deserve better. You deserve better than that. You deserve better. Period.

I know when things are down, they’re down for a reason. I have to hit the bottom to see the view towards the sky. Even if there are others who appear to have it all, I need to remind myself I deserve better, not more; a matter of quality over quantity.

If I lose something, I deserve to find something better. If I miss out on an opportunity, I deserve to get a better one. If someone leaves me, I deserve a better person in my life.

Why? I deserve better. I deserve better than that. Period.


5 Songs

I love music that I have a song for almost everything that I do. I play songs in my laptop, in my phone, in my head. I even have my MRT music, my walking music (aka my runway music), my shower song. It changes every now and then, I keep myself updated of course. That’s how addicted I am with music. And with my so-called career, music is a big part of my life. The following songs are some of the songs that I live by. Let the music and lyrics tell you my story.

Adios Ayer/ Jose Padilla (lyrics)
If there is new love, new ways, new changes in our lives. Those times will last forever and ever.

My emo song. If my life is a movie, this song will be played in the end. The credits will be rolled, uncut scenes from my life will be shown, those that I will truly treasure.

Pursuit Of Happiness/ Kid Cudi, MGMT & Ratatat (lyrics)
I'm on the pursuit of happiness and I know everything that shine ain't always gonna be gold. I'll be fine once I get it, I'll be good.

As I always say, Happiness is a choice, a decision that we make. Choose to be happy and you’ll be happy. Choose to be sad, and be sad. In 2010, Happiness is what I want in general. I may have my emo days, but happiness is still what I want to have in life. And love of course.

Show Me Love/ Robin S. (lyrics)
Heartbreaks and promises, I’ve had more than my share

A club classic that never fails to make me dance and just go gaga on the dance floor. I have almost all the possible remixes of this song. But if you read through the lyrics, it's really a sad emo love song.... you got to show me love....

No Ordinary Morning/ Chicane (lyrics)
But there was still something in your eyes, left me helpless and paralysed

On my emo days and nights, “No Ordinary Morning” never fails to make me cry. And I might play this tonight on loop until I fall asleep. Yes... you make me helpless and paralysed.

Going Wrong/ Armin Van Buuren feat Chris Jones (lyrics)
I keep searching forever in your eyes

And now... i close my eyes, with efav kicking it on a high, and dream of you.... Good night you!

So what's been playing in your head recently? Share share!