Dear HIV

There is no way to get rid you from my life. No one knows just yet. At this point, I know you’ll never leave me, I know; always promising, or threatening, that no matter where I go, or for how long, you’ll always be there. “I’m inside you,” you’ve whispered. I’ve cried behind closed doors, though I tell myself it has nothing to do with you. I don’t tell anyone you’re the reason I’m most often upset. I mask my pain; afraid of rapid fire questioning that will surely follow.

You never removed your ice cold grip from me, even when I sleep. You steal from me, and hurt me on purpose. I’m afraid of you, what you’ll do to me.

You’re my secret; dirty little and deep dark. I protect you, refusing to speak your name. I conceal your identity from those around me. You remind me, “No one will understand. You’ll be pigeonholed and stereotyped.” You pretend to have my best interests at heart, but I know you just want to keep me all to yourself. You’ll suffocate me.

You're my secret. Dark and Twisty.

4 Response to "Dear HIV"

  1. E Says:

    shut up! stop being a high maintenance bitch! BITCH! lolz!

  2. Trese Says:

    E... sa maling post ka nagcocomment. LOL! :p

  3. numerounoarnold Says:

    Just found this blogpost and your blog recently. I’ve quoted this post in my blog post about “coming out” about chronic conditions: http://community.wegohealth.com/profiles/blogs/coming-out-about-your Would love to hear your thoughts.

  4. Trese Says:

    Thanks for quoting my blog to yours :) appreciate it. Stigma is big with PLWH (People Living With HIV). As such, I decided to keep my status to myself and to a select few.